Ever heard of the saying “just because you are hearing doesn’t mean you are listening”? By definition, you listen when you pay attention to a sound; but hearing just means sound going into your ear (and mostly out the other).

Do you find yourself repeating many times to your child, and the message still doesn’t get across? The problem is likely information overload which actually cause your child to only hear you but not listen to you! That means, when you are saying the same things over and over, your words could just become nothing but background noise to your child!

In order for your child to listen attentively, either of 2 things must happen. (1) Every person speaking to him must make an effort to provide short and concise information to him, or (2) he learns how to focus in listening.

Now (1) is out of our control, but there are a few techniques to help your child learn (2). The simplest one is to make him repeat what you said. This will kind of force him to be focused when he listens the next time! But a more structured way would be to do something like this.

How many times does the word “the” appear in this passage?

“The farmer gave the boy some beans.

He said the beans are magical. The

boy thought to himself that he had

gotten a great deal this time from the

the farmer. He happily brought the

beans back to the village.”

Some people may answer 6. Some 7. But only the focused ones will answer 8 (there is one repeated).

If this is too tedious, read him 2 or 3 random paras from a story book, and ask him to tell you the number of times the word “the”, “he”, or “has” was read. Choose words that are short and appear many times.

Go on. Do this once a day and experience the difference in which your child focuses on listening after a week or so.

 

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